A Practice from Dr. Eger
My experience with Edie at the Holocaust museum, where I witnessed her use her past to be successful in her present, made me want to learn more about her process. In talking with Edie, about using a challenging moment from one's life, and learning how to use that as one's engine for growth, she suggested using this practice that she likes to use with her patients.
Go to a place in your home that is quiet and comfortable, and bring with you a notebook and pen to write some thoughts down. (you may need to print this section out or bring your laptop/phone so that you can read the steps as you do the process)
Now that you are ready, sitting comfortably, take a deep breath in, hold for 3 seconds, and release for 3 seconds. Then breathe in again deeply, hold for 3 seconds, and release for 3 seconds.
Now calmly bring to your mind a CHALLENGING MEMORY from your past that is still nagging you, or perhaps it is still painful or holding you hostage in some way. Allow this memory and moment to arise without judgment. This can be a small moment, or a big one, it does not matter. What matters is you trust your mind and your body to take you where to go. Remember to breathe while you think of this memory.
What is the first moment that comes to your mind?
As the moment crystalizes in your mind, open your journal and write:
the DATA of that moment (the objective facts): Where were you, who was there, and what happened.
how you FELT about that experience at the time: your emotions (mad, sad, glad, shame, guilt, and more)
Now we move into the present, reflecting back on that experience from where we are now.
Take two more deep breaths, holding at the top for 3 seconds, and then release.
As we move from that moment in the past to the person you are today, reflect on the positive qualities that you took from this moment that have helped you to become who you are today.
Write in your notebook 3 ways how this experience has POSITIVELY shaped you into the BRAVE HUMAN that you are today. Let them come to you, try not to search for them, but see what comes up naturally. (For example, I am stronger because of this, I am more vulnerable and open, I am more in touch with my feelings, etc)
If this part is not forthcoming, take another deep breath, quieting your mind, and see if you can find one way this memory has empowered you. As Edie says, “One thing we cannot change is the past, what we can control is how we look at it.”
Now, reread these three points. And as you reread them, try and put a smile on your face, and acknowledge that this memory can now begin to serve you and add strength into your being.
Finally, take a deep breath in, and as you breathe in feel the strength from this past experience fill you with every bit of oxygen that enters your lungs. Hold it in, feel it in your heart and in your being. Slowly let that air out, but keep that strength inside, there to bolster you up as you go back into your routine and into your life.
You may want to write any reflections from this experience in your notebook, and allow yourself time to process this experience before returning to your “real” life as going back into past times can be very emotional and triggering, so give yourself time to get back into this reality. You are on your path, and this work, these kinds of focused exercises will begin to tell your mind - “we are ready to change, and we are taking action to make it happen.”
As Edie says, “Positive talk means nothing without positive action” - and this journaling about your life and challenges IS positive action. Good for you! Celebrate yourself and your willingness to RISK.
This practice is a step to creating deeper trust in yourself. Think of this exercise as a stepping stone to becoming the most powerful version of yourself. As Edie says, we keep climbing that mountain, we slip and we climb, but never stop climbing. Sending all our love to you on YOUR journey!
If you enjoy this practice find more within Edie’s online courses:
